Remembering a Peaceful Visit to Thailand

Maybe it was all the news about stranded travelers due to the volcanic eruptions in Iceland that got me thinking about our last trip across an ocean—-to visit Thailand. Unfortunately, Thailand has also been in the news recently because of its political eruptions. But when Micha and I were there in November 2009, it seemed very peaceful. True, we were just there for a couple of weeks and we were only tourists. So we couldn’t tell what was going on beneath the surface.

Also, I did notice a couple of small articles in the Thai English language newspaper mentioning problems between the current Prime Minister Abhisit Vejjajiva and the former Prime Minister Thaksin Shinawatra. Nevertheless, I got the impression that the King, who seemed to be revered by everyone that we talked to, would be able to keep the peace. Obviously, I was wrong, but I hope that things will sort themselves out.

For those of you who are considering a trip to Thailand at some point in the future or who are curious about my impressions of the country, read on.

Bangkok
We started off in Bangkok. Our hotel, Navalai River Resort (www.navalai.com), was moderately priced and very comfortable with a pool on the roof, a good restaurant overlooking the river, and a dock where we could catch a water taxi. Water taxis are definitely the most comfortable way to move around in Bangkok, which has notoriously awful traffic.

Micha and I were both struggling with jet lag for the first couple of days of this trip, which made it a bit of a challenge to thoroughly enjoy the sites in Bangkok. My favorite activity was a dinner cruise that we took one evening--it was such a relaxing way to see the city at night. The classical Thai music and dancing added to the ambience. My favorite site in Bangkok was the Reclining Buddha. Of all the Buddhas that we saw in Thailand, the Reclining Buddha was the one that gave me the greatest feeling of peacefulness.

Phuket
After the hustle and bustle of Bangkok, we were happy that the next part of our trip was a leisurely week at the luxurious Marriott resort in Phuket (http://www.phuket.com/marriott/). We exchanged a week of our one-bedroom timeshare in Kauai for a two bedroom at the resort in Phuket and invited a couple of friends to join us. We walked on the beach, spent lots of time in the pools, took yoga classes, got massaged, and watched several of the sunset dance performances at the hotel’s reflecting pool.

One day, we hired a taxi and explored the island, stopping for a short hike to see a waterfall in one of the parks and spending a couple of hours swimming at Kata beach. This beach is particularly popular with families, because of its long shallow, sheltered bay.

Another day, we took a speedboat ride from the city of Phuket for a full afternoon of snorkeling and swimming around the smaller Phi Phi islands.

Knowing that I have a tendency to sea-sickness, I was pleased when the charter hostess handed out sea sickness pills for us to take prior to boarding. The boat accommodated about 20 passengers and crew. I had read that the seats in the back of the boat offered an easier ride. But they were already occupied. So I took a seat across the aisle from the driver and hoped for the best. Another member of the crew distributed bottles of water and soda before we got started and I selected a bottle of cola, because of its purported stomach settling qualities. I managed to take only one sip before realizing that it was impossible to drink anything while the boat was bumping over the waves like a bronco in a rodeo show.

I gripped the side of the boat and concentrated my gaze at the horizon—another purported technique to avoid seasickness. The water was dark grey and choppy. Would I be able to snorkel in water like this? Was the boat about to get hit by a sudden storm?

The Phi Phi islands are miles away from Phuket harbor and it took us about an hour to reach our first stop. What a relief it was to arrive in a sheltered bay. The sun had broken through the clouds. The water was calm and perfectly turquoise, the surrounding cliffs draped in tropical foliage, the beach an enticing carpet of soft, soft sand. Our guide told us that this spot was featured in the film “The Beach” with Leonardo DiCaprio. I hadn’t seen the film. Seems that the film didn’t get the best reviews. But we added watched it eagerly on Netflix when we returned home—thirsting for another look at that gem of a beach where we had immersed ourselves in the deliciously warm, turquoise water.

We had only a short ride to our next stop, Monkey Island. Our skipper pulled in very close to the island, but we didn’t actually disembark. Instead, we watched as our guide tossed bananas to the monkeys clambering down the cliffs to greet us. It was the first time that I’d ever seen a monkey swim. Apparently, they sometimes jump into the boat. But not during our visit.

Afterwards, the boat took us to a sheltered reef. It wasn’t within a bay, but they managed to select an area where the currents were amazingly gentle. Nevertheless, the guide suggested that we might want to wear life jackets while snorkeling, so that we could feel fully relaxed. I figured that it would also keep my warmer. So I took him up on his suggestion. It didn’t interfere with my moving around at all. And it probably did add to my feeling of relaxation as I watched various kinds of colorful tropical fish swimming around and below me.


ChaingMai
We had hired a guide for several days that we were spending up north. I felt like we could have used more time in this area of the country, and I would have liked to do more hiking than we did.


Maetang Elephant Park
My favorite day up North was the day we visited Maetang Elephant Park (www.elephantchiangmai.com ) north of Chiangmai. I loved the elephant ride, though I hadn’t known what to expect when Micha and I got on board. Don’t worry. They don’t let the tourists ride an elephant all my themselves. Our mahout sat bareback toward the front of the elephant and directed the elephant by moving his legs against the elephant’s ears. I had a feeling that the mahout might have been distracted by talking on his cellphone as Micha and I struggled not to slip completely off of our metal seat while the elephant descended down a surprisingly steep and narrow trail into the river. We didn’t fall off, but I did get a colorful array of bruises on the back of my arm from hanging on to the back of my seat during the bumpy ride. No matter. I would be happy to do it again! It was so much fun bouncing along on top of the elephant as we rode through the river and along the river bank from the Elephant Camp to a nearby tribal village.

Another highlight of the Elephant Park that didn’t involve a bumpy ride was watching Suda, the painting elephant. There were two elephants that painted for us. The older elephant threw a lot of bright colors onto canvas, in a style reminiscent of Jackson Pollock. But Suda is not an abstract artist. She started by drawing a black curvy line, and kept adding more lines to create an elephant body, legs, tail, ear and eye—all in the right places. She even added a flower, putting in the details of a green stem with leaves and a yellow blossom. And finally, she signed her own name in clear block letters at the top of the painting. Very impressive.

Too Late for Conversation with My Mother

It’s too late to have the type of conversation that I would have liked to have with my mother. And who knows if that would have possible anyway.

I have seen photos of my mother as a wistful little girl, as a laughing teenager posing with her girlfriends, and as a young mother overflowing with love for the two small children in her arms.

Maybe I could have used those photos as a basis for talking to her person to person. Or maybe not.

When prompted, Mom would agree to tell me some stories about her childhood. I got the impression that she grew up in a happy family. Not so well off financially. But not living in a tenement like my father’s family. Her parents owned their own house and for a while, before the Depression, owned some additional rental property.

Mom had a lot of respect for her father, whom we all called Papa. Like Tevya, in Fiddler on the Roof, Papa had fled with his family from a Russian shtetl because of the pogroms. His two older children, my Uncle Harry and Aunt Esther, were born in Russia, while Mom and her younger brother Sol were born in Cambridge, Massachusetts. For some reason, maybe because of the paranoia of the McCarthy era, no one ever mentioned the fact that two of the children were born prior to the family’s immigration. In any case, I think that Harry and Esther probably arrived in the United States when they were still very small children.

I thought my mother was lucky to have not one but two brothers AND a sister. I had only my brother Paul. He would play with me sometimes. But not when his buddies were around. I had the impression that more siblings would have meant that I would always have playmates available.

Papa had also brought over his own father, who lived with the family and looked a lot like Count Tolstoy. Papa’s brothers came, too. One brother settled down in the nearby town of Roxbury. Another moved to New Hampshire. My mother grew up surrounded by lots of family.

Mom told me that she would have liked to teach kindergarten, but Papa didn’t believe that girls should study beyond high school. “You don’t need to be a nanny for someone else’s children,” he said. “You’ll have your own.”

Mom and her sister acquiesced to his decision, although both their brothers managed to work their way through Harvard and Harvard Law School. “We weren’t as smart as Sol and Harry,” Mom told me.

In later years, Mom did manage to get a job teaching Sunday School and worked as a teaching assistant in a Jewish Day School and seemed to enjoy the work a lot. Mostly, she was a housewife, although she didn’t particularly like to cook, bake, or clean.

It was nice to have her home waiting for me and my brother with glasses of milk and cookies when we came home from school. I’m sure she liked the fact that she could be there and listen to the news of our day. But I think she might have been happier if she had been able to combine motherhood with a part-time job.

When I was in high school, Mom did take a clerical job to help with the additional expenses of my brother’s college tuition. She exchanged her frumpy looking house-dresses for business clothes and started getting her hair done more often. She became friends with her co-workers and would tell me funny stories about her day at work. It seemed to broaden her horizons, made her more interested in what was going on in the world around her, and gave her a sense of pride that she could earn money, too.

It’s almost 8 years since Mom passed away. I miss talking to her. Sometimes, I feel an urge to pick up the phone and call her. It was mostly on the phone that we talked, after all, since she lived in Florida and I live in California.


I think of Mom especially on Friday nights when I light the candles, remembering all the Friday nights when we lit candles together while I was growing up.

I thought of Mom when my daughter Orli got married and when my grandson was born. She’d be pleased to see what a wonderful mother Orli is.

I’m glad that Mom did get the nachus, the pleasure and satisfaction, of seeing her children grow up to get married and become parents, themselves.

Who knows, maybe she can still see what is going on in our lives today. If so, I think she must be pleased to see that all five of her grandchildren (my three daughters, and my brother's son and daughter) have grown up to become independent and productive—traits that Mom valued highly.